It’s as if Bs like this are afraid to ask questions for fear of sounding incompetent. Instead they’d rather just pretend to know what to do – and usually end up pretending their way through life. So don’t pretend they don’t deserve your punch.

Remind you of a B you know? Tag them!
URL: http://thebtheory.com/2011/07/28/the-ok-b

Such a B can never let anyone get away with telling a good story. They must beat your story to save their egos from complete collapse. Sometimes what they say is true and sometimes it’s not, but you can always count on it be annoying as hell. So, how can you not punch this B?

Remind you of a B you know? Tag them!
URL: http://thebtheory.com/2011/07/13/the-one-up-b

I’m sure most are familiar with this B. They’re the ones that will end a good rally of jokes by blurting out gibberish – and then proceed to laugh (sometimes violently) as if to suggest what they just said was funny.. or even coherent. The sad part is this B will go on living life thinking that they are normal. Punch.

Remind you of a B you know? Tag them!
URL: http://thebtheory.com/2011/06/30/the-incoherent-jokes-b

It’s as if this B’s fragile ego hinges on romanticized stories about how they discovered something before it became popular. And once whatever it is does become popular, they seize the opportunity to start talking shit – in a pathetic effort to further their social status. But they’re really only cementing their status as a B. Punchable? Of course.

Remind you of a B you know? Tag them!
URL: http://thebtheory.com/2011/06/22/the-first-to-know-b

Such a useless B will write the most pointless things in their Facebook status and will usually flood your news feed – presumably as a way of getting the attention they crave. Usually no one cares to respond, so they’ll continue to write more and more until their existence is noticed. Such a pitiful B. Punch.

Remind you of a B you know? Tag them!
URL: http://thebtheory.com/2010/07/27/the-facebook-status-b

Such a B will cry foul if you put a santa hat on your pet dog, or give your cat a funny fur-cut. Just because it doesn’t happen in the wild, doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy it. As a side note, check out this parasailing donkey:

Remind you of a B you know? Tag them!
URL: http://thebtheory.com/2010/07/27/the-animal-cruelty-b

It’s awkward and disgusting at the same time. Why can’t this B just let you do your business and be out instead of getting you to acknowledge the reality of what just happened. Very inconsiderate. Worthy of a solid punch.

Remind you of a B you know? Tag them!
URL: http://thebtheory.com/2010/07/18/the-rip-acknowledging-b

Such a B will usually do the opposite of anything you tell them, for the paranoid belief that they are always being manipulated. It’s hard to get this B to do things without having them believe it was their idea and that it is actually beneficial to said B. Deserving of a punch? Of course.

Remind you of a B you know? Tag them!
URL: http://thebtheory.com/2010/07/16/the-me-against-the-world-b

Such a B doesn’t dance to celebrate, he does it because he thinks he owes it to everyone as a way of “giving back”. While the rest of the party guests dance in the moment and enjoy themselves, the Dabke B is oblivious to his real surroundings and imagines he is on TV, leading the polls in “So you think you can Dance”. You can always tell the Dabke B apart from the rest because he’s the only one sweating profusely and not smiling. He probably can’t breathe. Don’t be surprised if he splits his pants before the night is through – making everyone uncomfortable. Punching will set him straight.

Remind you of a B you know? Tag them!
URL: http://thebtheory.com/2010/06/21/the-dabke-b

Everything must be done by the book with this B – even for the most trivial of things. Hang around such a B for too long and you’ll lose your shit with all the annoying rules you’ll be forced to follow. Punching is the only way to go.

Remind you of a B you know? Tag them!
URL: http://thebtheory.com/2010/05/06/the-anal-b